My boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship.
The fact you say that they're triggered usually around your boyfriend says a lot, however I think what would be helpful is if you take a new perspective on things.
What you can do:Find an activity outside the house that brings you joy.
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I have been in a similar situation when I was younger, I made the mistake of thinking that my partner was responsible for my happiness.
I want so much more for him, and for us.
You don't get a free pass.
You could cower and wait and feel miserable or you could bite the bullet, take your chances and see if this can be resolved.